Love or A Lifetime Warranty?

I dip my virtual pen in sorrow as I write this post...Lately there has been a dramatic rise in domestic crime. I'm not talking about violence, nor is this in reference to the recently rising abortion rate. But rather, this problem is one of a deep-seated, carnal nature...

I am, of course, referring to the onslaught of couples getting engaged and married this summer. America's single men and women are dropping like flies, and nobody, I repeat nobody has even attempted to do anything about this. Where is Barack Obama? Where is FEMA? Where is Oprah Winfrey to tell us what to do??? (see: The White House basketball court, notNewOrleans, and KFC)

...but seriously, mad people are gettin' wifed-up this summer.

What I'm actually writing about is a concept that intrigued me. Last night, Meg and I watched this film called TiMER. The basic idea was that people would get a computer chip in their wrist that had a countdown to the moment they would meet their soul-mate. The countdown would begin when both people recieved the chip. Eventually they would meet, settle down, raise fat babies, and live a happy life.
What's A Plot Without Loopholes? Of course, there were the rebels who refused the chip, or had it removed because they'd found love before they met "The One" (I promise, it's actually a decent movie). I wish I could say that in the end, love prevails, and technology fails, but I fell asleep for the last 2 minutes and missed the finale del grande. I have no idea what happened. Meg wouldn't tell me...rude.


A Related Ponder Regarding The Human Psyche
Would people really be that willing to sell themselves short, and miss out on the experience of love, emotion, and dating (or what I call, "practice relationships") because they are THAT desperate for a sure thing? If love were to blossom and flourish before meeting The One, would you drop everything and commit to love? Or would you cast it aside for Microsoft's lifetime guarantee? (see: getting pwnd by AppleCare) Would it cheapen the experience to have a lifetime commitment reduced to countdown form? (see, also: New Year's Eve, and Nuclear Holocaust)

There are 3 things that the Modern American wants:

1. To Be Loved and Respected

2. Instant Results

3. To Save 15% Or More On Your Car Insurance By Switching To Geico

The main character found herself in this very predicament, and found herself unable to admit what she wanted. She was blinded by the chip in her wrist. How many of us are in that same predicament? We are so obsessed with "finding the right person for me" that we don't even realize it when they are standing right in front of our face, saying, "Micah, I want to spend the rest of my life with you." We abandon love because we see something that might be a better option. It could work out better with this person. Bah, Humbug! (see: A Muppet Christmas Carol...the other versions are hella lame)

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This brings me to one of the two best pieces of relationship advice I've ever recieved:

"When you find the girl that can put up with your antics for more than 6 months, and still be madly in love with you, snatch that up."

The other is, "if you want to know what your girlfriend's gonna look like in 30 years, take a good look at her mother. Merry Christmas."

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I'm not sure if the first one was a shot at my totally-easy-to-deal-with personality, but hey...my TiMER ran out in September 2007. (see: Meg's Freshman Year, and the picture below)

This is what most of our pictures look like.

3 years sure does work wonders

So kids, the moral of today's story is Once you find it, stick with it. There is no lifetime guarantee, or "One Specific Person" out of the 6.5 billion that is meant for you, but you're probably gonna find someone who's worth keeping around. This type of love involves making a conscious decision to stay faithful and true to a person for the rest of your lives. It involves taking that long, hard look at her mother and deciding if this is something you want to commit to or not. It involves late-night trips to CVS because your wife's pregnant and craving a Choco-Taco at 2am (what? who said anything about pregnancy? I'm too young to have kids!) (see: The thought that just ran through your head). You're Welcome.

Side Note: This post ended up having nothing to do with the intended topic...oh well.